Drinking: A shampoo cap of "ice coffee" made from bath water with a side of soap. I told her it needed more milk. She gets some favorite child points for knowing one of my favorite drinks.
Unintentionally: potty training. I didn't mean for it to happen but it sort of just did. Occasionally AB will tell me when she has a dirty diaper and I tell her the real key here is to tell me before she goes. I bought one of those little seats that goes on the real toilet on a whim a few months ago and every so often she asks to sit on it. The other day she was sitting on it stark naked and she asked me to scratch her back while she waited to poop. WHAT HAS MY LIFE BECOME? What happened to my dreams of being a social secretary for the First Lady?! Or being the First Lady myself?
Slightly disgruntled with: the library. We went to a new library this morning for our big Monday activity. Before we left I did extensive research on which books I wanted and even wrote down the call numbers so I wouldn't have to drag Sesame around on a wild goose chase. I'd swoop right in, grab the book off the shelf and off we'd go. It was a flawless plan. Except nothing went according to plan. I couldn't find any of my three books. I've never seen such a complex numbering system. None of the books were where they should have been and I checked three times. I didn't want to ask for help because I was too proud to admit I didn't understand the library. I'm fine asking for help to find one book, but three seemed like a little too much. At that point I'd just hand them my grocery list and ask them to do that shopping too. I briefly considered telling the librarian I just moved to this country and my country uses a different system but I cannot lie. Meanwhile, Annabelle was climbing on chairs and telling the whole library about her snowman book. "I gotta s'owman book, Mama! I sittin in the chay-ya, Mama." Since I never found my books I'll be stuck reading Winnie the Pooh from A to Zzzzz and All You Need for a Snowman for the next three weeks.
Not understanding: why people in this state insist on eating vegetables for breakfast. Every week at MOPS there's a platter of vegetables with ranch dressing. I enjoy carrots and ranch but not at 10 o'clock in the morning. We went out for breakfast and the lady next to us was eating salad. I don't understand this place.
Getting worked up over: someone telling me I could "just pray nausea away" when pregnant. You'd better believe I did pray for healing when I was throwing up 5-7 times a day for months on end. I prayed every day and God said N-O. Don't tell me all I needed was a little more faith and I would have been healthy as a horse. That's about as infuriating as telling me to "just eat saltines" or "all you need to do is wear a seasickness bracelet" or "have you tried ginger?" or, possibly worst of all, "I threw up a couple times so I know how you feel." I'm getting VERY WORKED UP ABOUT THIS.
Watching: Downton Abbey and The Bachelor. They are so different but they both bring me so much joy.
Internally crying over: Annabelle's upcoming birthday. She'll be two. TWO. Do you understand how much this upsets me? Just last week she wasn't even six pounds and newborn clothes were too big for her. Now she's singing the alphabet and pointing to Texas on the map. At this rate she'll be making me a grandmother by next week.
2 comments:
No vegetable should ever be eaten before at least noon. Also, I cracked up about your strategy for pretending you just came from a different country at the library. Like the time I incorrectly counted money at DD and was so mortified I pretended I didn't speak English. But it's probably good you didn't go that route because obviously you could never return to that particular library branch again lol!
I am STILL furious over the lady. Apparently I didn't have enough faith either to keep myself from losing ten pounds in several days. I wouldn't wish HG on anyone, but I wouldn't mind if people like that experienced a few days of it.
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