Wednesday, November 4, 2015

Wednesday thoughts

+ Last night I was so worked up about something I saw on facebook that I couldn't sleep for ages. When I finally fell asleep I dreamt I was wearing hearing aids that looked like contact lenses. I popped them in and one could tell I was wearing them. I'd recording this now in the event contact hearing aids become a thing in the future. You heard about them here first. Twelve years ago I invented Skype but didn't patent it. Lets just say I'd be a lot richer if I had.

+ I made myself wait until November to buy AB any Christmas pajamas. It's no exaggeration that I believe she needs one pair for each night in December. I LOVE Christmas clothes. The more wintery and Christmasy the better. When I went to Target last week to buy diapers I almost passed out from all the Christmas jammie options. I wanted to buy them all then go home and drink hot chocolate by the fire.

+ Speaking of Target, I think I'm the only white girl in America who doesn't love that store. On a scale of one to ten I'm very meh about it. I hear that people like shopping while drinking the PSL they bought from the in-store Starbucks but that doesn't work for me. I can't shop and drink at the same time. The drink is sure to spill on whatever is in the cart. When I go to clean it up I'm sure to knock over a rack of hats. What if there's no place to put the drink when I need two hands to look at something? There are too many ways for things to end up terribly.

+ I'd like to make a small adjustment to the calendar. Can the powers that be please switch Thanksgiving to the beginning of October? I understand that it's an important holiday, but it really gets in the way of my Christmas decorating. I can't make myself decorate with reindeer and candles until after Thanksgiving but that only gives me a month to enjoy it. I want all the time I can get to soak up the Christmas lights and decorate trees. I want to hang our stockings and decorate the mantle with little houses. I need time to carefully craft paper snowflakes. If the government can dictate what time we set our clocks surely they can do something about this Thanksgiving situation.

+ Tomorrow is Christopher's birthday. I am all about a birthday. I love a good theme and fancy straws that match the table décor. The more festive the better. Christopher is not into birthdays. He'd be perfectly fine with a nice dinner and nothing more. I brought up having a Minnie Mouse theme because I know AB would love it, but he said no self respecting 33 year old man wants a Minnie party. Having previously said he doesn't care if there's a theme I think he lost the privilege of vetoing my ideas. Yesterday Sesame and I went to the dollar store for balloons. It should come as no surprise that they are for the benefit of the ladies in the family. Tomorrow we'll decorate a banner. It will be a very classy banner made from construction paper with an assortment of animal and Sophia the First stickers. It will be perfect for a manly man. This is the first birthday Annabelle will be aware of and I want her to learn how fun they can be. I'll probably break out the fancy straw so she can get the full experience.

I have THE HARDEST time finding gifts for him. He's so difficult to shop for. It was hard enough finding birthday and Christmas gifts but now I need to add Father's Day gifts to the mix and it's a million times harder. He had mentioned that he wanted a Texas flag to hang in the basement with his confederate and early American flags. Annabelle volunteered pennies from her turtle bank for the purchase. Last week I noticed all the flags were off the wall and when I asked why, he said they "looked silly". I'm not returning the Texas flag so tomorrow night he'll be getting more silly in a gift bag. 

+ I introduced Christopher to Dubsmash. There's no more festive way to ring in his year age than lip syncing songs from the by gone days of his youth.


Laura Darling said...

Michelle invented the itunes/ipod long before Steve Jobs did and has never quite gotten over the concept being stolen from her. Between her inventing apple and you inventing Skype I would have two rich friends! :)

Jen said...

I don't like getting drinks while shopping either, it stresses me out.

Kara said...

I love Target, but I'm amazed at the people who have no self control there. You see all the memes about going to target for milk and coming out with $150 worth of stuff and no milk. I can go to Target, buy milk an nothing else. I don't see what that is so hard.

Amanda said...

Did you happen to be at Target when they were doing the buy one, get one half off on Christmas jammies? I passed on it because I'm not quite ready for Christmas... but the assortment was insane! Haha. Also I concur that the no place to put the cup while shopping at Target is really a joke.