Thursday, March 28, 2013

a few facts that are not related in any way (except the two that discuss my driving skills or lack there of)

* Last night Christopher told me about a study he read on why people twitch when they're falling asleep. I told him about a baby at school who had such a terrible blowout that the only way to free him from his filthy clothes was to cut them off his body.

He wasn't quite sure what to do with that story.

* Earlier in the week I asked Christopher if anything major had happened in the world because I have been too busy to read the news, but not too busy to check out the latest sales on the Old Navy website. I'm wondering if I should rearrange my priorities because apparently cute clothes > knowing about what new threat our country is facing.

* I've been experiencing an unusual tingling in my right thumb. I refuse to look up possible causes on WebMD because then I'll convince myself I have cancer or am dying and who has time for all that three days before Easter? I've self-diagnosed myself as having Texters Thumb.

* A digger with a full load of rocks almost hit me this morning. I was in the car and only escaped certain death (or at least dealing with the insurance company) through a show of impressive driving skilz. And by that I mean I didn't stall as I sped out of his way.

* I almost drove into Dunkin' Donuts as I picked up my medium French vanilla ice coffee today. Not the I went into the drive-through lane kind of into Dunkin' Donuts. I almost drove INTO the building.

I'd rather not discuss it anymore.

Monday, March 25, 2013

cruisin' around the classroom

I have a very good reason for not blogging much lately. I've been cruising around the Bahamas, swimming with dolphins, watching the sun set, and in general living the easy life without a care in the world.

Nothing could be farther from the truth.

In reality I've been spending hours upon hours at the preschool doing my student teaching. I have 1131/2 (the half is very important when every minute counts!) of 300 hours done so this week I plan on rewarding myself with a day off. Because when every minute counts it makes perfect sense to take 8 hours off. Logic was never my strong point.

Spending 113.5 hours with a combination of preschoolers, toddlers and infants has lead me to the following revelation- I hope I never EVER have 19 toddlers. I love children and all, but I can only handle a certain amount of time with two people drooling down my neck, three people pulling my hair, four people fighting for my lap, and one more child pulling my earrings while they are all crying and/or screaming. God bless toddler teachers. May they all receive a pay raise.

The other day Dylan was banging the pictures of presidents with a plastic hammer and I said, "We do not hit Abraham Lincoln in the face with a hammer. It's very disrespectful." It was exactly what I envisioned saying when I woke up that morning.

I had to tell two of the toddler girls not to touch their friends tongue with their own tongue. You would have thought I ruined their lives forever.

Like I said, it's been all sunsets and dolphins over here.

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

his & hers

Christopher's shower necessity:
My shower necessities:
Clearly I enjoy having an array of options.
Going the 3 in 1 route is much too convenient. 

Thursday, March 14, 2013

sunrise, sunset and all that

We begin our stroll down memory lane at The Crib, the favorite hangout of little Sarah and her sidekick Lissy.
Our mothers made us matching outfits because what's cuter than dressing two little girls who like holding hands in poofy little rompers? Speaking of outfits, what's more hilarious than the outfit on the girl behind us? 
We jump ahead to one of our annual photoshoot at Olan Mills, circa 1998. Obviously this was taken before Aaron decided to make things difficult every. single. time we shelled out good money to have our picture professionally taken. His chubby little too-much-cuteness-to-handle face kills me. Elizabeth is just precious. 
Here we are in an almost identical pose at my wedding. The years, HOW THEY FLY.
I have very few pictures from my early teen years available at the moment, but I do have this picture taken one summer at our friends pool. Andrew and I decided to take finding a penny at the bottom of a pool to new heights. Or lower deeps, as the case may be. We tossed in the penny and worked together until we could pick it up using only our toes. It's a talent I plan on including when I update my resume.
Our final stop on this brief tour is the day Autumn and I played Pretty Pretty Princess with Molly. When Molly left we kept playing (hello! It's jewelry and we're girls) and things got very competitive. I firmly believe I had the best outfit because I had a mirror for a hat.
Even Princess Kate in all her fashion glory can't say that. 

Monday, March 11, 2013

weekend 3.8.13

We had a delightful weekend planned.

Please note the use of the word HAD because it's important to the following story.

For Christmas I told Christopher I would take him to the Nashville Symphony. Not only does he enjoy classical music, few things make me feel more cultured than saying I'm spending the evening at the symphony. (Although saying I'm going to a wine tasting is up there in the cultured and sophisticated column.)

We finally got tickets for Friday night because there's nothing quite like cashing in a Christmas gift 3 months later. On Thursday night someone who would like to remain anonymous pulled up her email to double check the time of the concert and, to her shock and horror, discovered that the concert was LAST FRIDAY.

It was a low point in my week.

A very low point.

I may have created my own symphony of moans and groans.

The only silver lining is that last Friday was the Josh Turner concert and not to put my own desires before Christopher and his Christmas gift, but I would have been VERY UPSET to not see Josh.

That's how we ended up spending our Friday night with these people.
Obviously culture and sophistication were thrown to the wind.

On Saturday our mile long to-do list included a gym date. I was going to Zumba and Christopher was going to use the various exercise machines I don't even pretend to understand. As the time approached for us to leave, one of us (who will not remain anonymous because I want you all to know it wasn't me) lay down on the couch and fell asleep. 

That's how I ended up going to the gym alone. 

Sunday we both woke up sounding like a cross between a seal and a lion (not to be confused with a sealion). We've been visiting a new church and would like to stay on everyone's good side so we stayed home. (Although who wouldn't want to hear a seal/lion symphony of coughs?)

That's how we ended up watching a sermon on the computer while Christopher rejoiced about being about to enjoy a Tasty B (aka beer) while worshiping the Lord.

As for the concert fiasco, I've already bought tickets to another concert in May. I'll be emailing myself reminders for WEEKS in advance.

Linking up with Sami's Shenanigans

Thursday, March 7, 2013

{almost} picture perfect

Yesterday Christopher brought home our professional photo from last month's ball.

Of course I have comments.

1. Christopher's bowtie. The thing looks like its about to turn into a propeller and fly away. 
2. The photographer knew just where to stand to include my triple chins in the picture.
3. The back of my dress is the prettiest part. Next time I wear it I'll pay the photographer to take a picture of me from behind. That wouldn't be odd or possibly uncomfortable.
4. Note to Future Sarah- don't have your hair done 5 hours before the event. Especially if it's a windy day.

Other than that I have no complaints! 

Monday, March 4, 2013

I don't dance in public to just anyone

The reason it's taken me so long to blog about my big Josh Turner evening is because I was asked to join his band and I've been too busy rehearsing to spend time on the computer. Everyone in the band is very impressed with my maraca shaking skilz. 

I was going to write about it on Saturday but I ended up watching a movie instead. Then Sunday we spent the afternoon hanging ten mirrors in the kitchen and it WIPED ME OUT. Handing Christopher nails while commenting on why tape measures are useful is very draining. 

Contrary to what we believed, the concert was not only Josh Turner. It was the Grand Ole Opry radio show featuring about ten different performers. Most of the performers were from back in ye olden days, like this man in a cactus shaped tie. 
Blake Shelton made an appearance. Based on the screams from the young ladies in attendance, it was quite obvious he's a current star. 
When Josh finally appeared, this happened. The camera couldn't handle the awesomeness.  
Josh was just as delightful as I hope he would be. Slightly smaller, but still delightful. He was so funny too.
Here he is reading the details of my babysitting contract. I only requested three private concerts a month which I think is totally reasonable considering I'd be watching three children. 
Right before he played Why Don't We Just Dance, Josh said to find someone to dance with. I would have danced with him but Mrs. Turner was there and I didn't want to cause a problem. Not to mention that my husband was also there. I've danced along to that song in the kitchen using a wooden spoon as a microphone/dance partner, but it was so much more fun to dance with Christopher while it was being sung live. Christopher and I normally dance to Love Me Tender but let's face it, Elvis will never sing to us live. 
I'm almost a Josh Turner concert expert but not quite. I think I have to attend a lot a few more just to be sure.

Friday, March 1, 2013

The time I saw Josh's face on a bag of onions was the best grocery trip ever

Tonight I'm going to a concert starring one of my main men. You may be thinking, "I had no idea Christopher sings in public! And at the Grand Ole Opry no less!" That's because he doesn't.

I mean my other main man.
Granted, our relationship is very one-sided at this point (do you think I'd be posing WITH A BENCH if I really knew him?), but it's only a matter of time before he realizes we're BFF's. I'm always available to be a backup singer/babysitter if he needs it. 

This is how Christopher looked when I told him that if Josh looks at me and starts singing, "If I gave you my hand would you take it?" I'll have no option but to answer in the affirmative.

I don't know what Christopher is all up in arms about. It's not like he wasn't the one who suggested I wear my cowboy boot earrings to the concert. And is driving me. And paid for the ticket. And the one I'm going home with. 

I don't think he has much to worry about.