Wednesday, September 3, 2014

Contrary to how it appears, this is not a pregnancy announcement. I repeat. This is NOT an announcement.

 One year ago today we saw Sesame for the first time.
If I'm being completely honest, the best parts about today were not the moments when she finally stopped crying from teething pain when I took a super cute baby wearing a giant flower bow to story time, when we went for a swim in her pool, or even when she laughed when I kissed her neck. The very best part was that unlike this day last year, I didn't throw up once.  

She's a sweet baby now, but there were many a dark day getting her here.

Tuesday, September 2, 2014

it's a very hairy situation

I got a haircut last week. Normally I wouldn't mention it except, naturally, it didn't go according to plan. 

It all goes back to the fact that my normal hairdresser moved. It really was rude of the Army to relocate the husband of the only hairdresser I've ever loved. This tragic move meant Mary cut my hair. She did a great job washing my hair with caviar shampoo but things started to get a little stressful when she brought out the scissors. Every time I've prepared for a haircut over the last twelve years I've debated doing something drastic. In the end I always fall back on my trim the ends/lots of layers/out the door I go approach. I originally told Mary I only wanted a trim but I started second guessing myself after noticing how good her short hair looked. Error number one. My hair would never look as good as hers.

I mentioned that to her which, I NOW KNOW, was my second error. She said she could trim a little more then see how we liked it. After all, it's only hair. Hair grows back. I should have known better than to go down that slippery slope. Then she said that since this was no longer a "trim", I had enough hair I could donate. I said that was fine, as long as my length stayed around the middle of my back (at this point it was near my waist). Three minutes later she held a ponytail of my hair that was no longer attached to my head in front of my face and snip, snip, snip my hair was AT MY SHOULDERS. I now present a question to you, good people of the internet. HOW COULD THERE HAVE BEEN ANY CONFUSION AS TO WHERE THE MIDDLE OF MY BACK WAS? 

I almost cried. 

Mary kept cutting away, telling me how good it looked and how she was so glad I decided to try it. Have I mentioned how emotional I was? I didn't want to tell her I wasn't a fan because what could she have done about it? Pick my hair up off the floor and glue it back on? Make a wig for me out of the hair I just donated to cancer patients? I barely made it to the car before sending Christopher this desperate message:
The first time I put my hair in a ponytail all I could think was I haven't had a ponytail that short since I was 5. To sum it up in three words- I FEEL BALD. I don't know how to work with the small amount of hair I have. Mary said my curls would be better than ever but I have yet to see that promised land. Not to mention that it looks like I got a Mom Cut and I absolutely didn't want that. People keep telling me it looks good (or that I need to relax because it's just hair but I was VERY ATTACHED to my hair) but I don't know. That's why I'm currently in search of a hair loss support group. 
Please know that it makes me feel incredibly awkward to post this picture of myself. I'm so bad at talking selfies (or as they were called back in the day, self portraits) that it took me 8 tries to get this. Also. I may be smiling on the outside but I was crying on the inside.

Thursday, August 28, 2014

five month Annabelle

At the exact moment I turned 5 months I was sitting with Mom and refusing to take a nap.
Vital Statistics: I had packed on the pounds and made it all the way to 12lbs 13 oz but I lost some (I blame the heat and all the sweating) so now I'm down to 12.3. I'm around 24 inches. I'm 72nd percentile for height and 9th for weight. I don't even know what that means.

What's up with my wardrobe: I mostly wear 0-3 month clothes but occasionally my wardrobe consultant will bring out something a little bigger. Mama put me in a size 2 diaper and not to go into all the details, but we discovered size 2 is too big.   
Sometimes I only wear one shoe. I'm a trend setter.
I dislike: a wet diaper, cloth diapers, when 30 minutes have gone by and no one has talked to me

I enjoy/am mildly amused at: my rubber ducky, swimming in my pool, playing Fly Baby, when Dad sings the special song he wrote for me
Milestones of my young life this month:
* I go to story time at the library. I'm the youngest child there so sometimes I get stepped on or tripped over. It doesn't faze me much.
* This week I learned how to roll from my back to my belly.
* I've decided to start boycotting bottles. This is not a popular decision.
* I had been sleeping through the night for months but recently decided to start walking up for a snack every morning at 3-3:30. Again, my parents (especially my mom) do not support such behavior.

* The nap schedule my mother worked so hard to establish is a joke these days. I sleep when I feel like it. 
* I like to touch the face of the person talking to me.
* Mama let me lick a banana and I was not a fan.
* I'm trying so hard to sit up by myself.
* I've started to get a little attitude.
* Once in a great while I'll give a hug.
Editorial comment- This was the fastest month yet. She's growing too fast. Someone make it stop. ENOUGH OF THIS NONSENSE.  

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

sweaty is not one of my best looks

It's hot here. Really, really hot. Like, 184* with humidity of 1200%.

Have I mentioned that our air conditioning has a mind of its own and only works half the time?

Sometimes all we can do is sit in a mini lawn chair in the middle of the living room and look out the window, longing for a day when we will live in a state where no one melts .6 seconds after walking out the door.
The heat has lead to lots of naked time for the baby. "Heeeeeeey, Mom!!!!"
"I'M PEERING INTO YOUR SOUL. Do you have any food hidden there? When's my next meal? Do you like my eyes? I'm hungry."
Yesterday it was so hot I couldn't even take her swimming in our hot tub on the face of the sun kiddie pool on the deck. The next best activity was entertaining herself by putting Honeypot on her head. 
I prefer that activity over her latest development- rolling from her back to her stomach, OMG I cannot handle it. I'm not sure whether to curl up the fetal position because she's growing too fast or because I'm dying from heat stroke.
"Did somebody say lunchtime?"

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Sweet Sesame

I'm not just saying it because she's my baby or because I want to publicly compliment my people making skilz, but Sesame is the sweetest baby.

She has recently decided to boycott bottles and she's started a whine that gets VERY annoying VERY quickly so it's not all sunshine and rainbows, but other than that she's the bee knees. (Come back when she's in the terrible twos and we'll see how chipper I am.)

Annabelle and Mr. Lion still sleep in our room at night. 
She takes naps in her crib and I have no doubt she could sleep in her crib through the night, but how will I hold her hand in the middle of the night if she's in another room? She loves having her hand held. 
I was all geared up to move her to her crib when I started listening to a biography of Charles Lindburg's wife. I got to the point where their son was kidnapped FROM HIS BEDROOM and decided that she's never going to sleep anywhere that's not within three feet of me. Bonus- she'll never want to sneak boys into a room she's sharing with her parents.
She LOVES to be held but hasn't been very into a lot of cuddling until lately. I am not complaining. 
We've been reading to her since she was born, but she's starting to pay more attention to the pictures. 
She's our favorite child.

Saturday, August 16, 2014

this did not start off as a review of our screen time

Back in ye olden days of 2010 when I was 10elbees lighter and didn't have gray hair.
We went on a date today! Currently Blogless Stephanie watched the baby so we could go see the One Hundred Feet Journey. Unlike some movie dates in the past, we both understood everything that happened. Our movie viewing history has had some highs and lows.

When we saw a Jason Bourne movie a few years I was so lost I eventually started counting how many pieces of popcorn I ate to entertain myself. The movie didn't even have Jason Bourne in it. It was all about some dude named Aaron Cross so why they didn't name it the Aaron Cross Legacy is beyond me.
About to attend our first ball together.
Look at that face. Christopher could hardly contain his excitement!
The last James Bond movie came out a few years ago on Christopher's birthday. In preparation for it's debut we watched the previous JB movies. Again, the confusion was real. After the first one I had to read the wikipedia page to understand most of what was happening. Thanks to wikipedia, when we watched the last one I was bursting with pride that I knew what was about to happen before Christopher did. He didn't want to know so I had no one to share my joy with. The level of unrealistic things that go on in those movies are unbelievable. Listen. If you fall hundreds of feet off a moving train after being shot, you're dead. I don't care if you're Harrison Ford, you're still going to be dead. Not to mention the scene where he's at a fancy theater talking very loudly into his secret device and nobody shushes him. In what theater would this be acceptable behavior? Not to mention this:
Then there was the time when I was sick as a dog pregnant and we watched the Downton Abbey season finale. I LOVE Downton Abbey but couldn't keep myself awake for the whole episode. I was so upset with myself for falling asleep, with Christopher (how DARE he let me fall alseep) and with my life in general that I was still grumpy about 24 hours later. I was a true joy and delight to live with that week.

I'm not sure how a post intended to be about our romantic date turned into me rehashing movies I don't understand. I'll ponder it while I study wikipedia on the new James Bond movie coming out in 2015.