Tuesday, August 26, 2014

sweaty is not one of my best looks

It's hot here. Really, really hot. Like, 184* with humidity of 1200%.

Have I mentioned that our air conditioning has a mind of its own and only works half the time?

Sometimes all we can do is sit in a mini lawn chair in the middle of the living room and look out the window, longing for a day when we will live in a state where no one melts .6 seconds after walking out the door.
The heat has lead to lots of naked time for the baby. "Heeeeeeey, Mom!!!!"
"I'M PEERING INTO YOUR SOUL. Do you have any food hidden there? When's my next meal? Do you like my eyes? I'm hungry."
Yesterday it was so hot I couldn't even take her swimming in our hot tub on the face of the sun kiddie pool on the deck. The next best activity was entertaining herself by putting Honeypot on her head. 
I prefer that activity over her latest development- rolling from her back to her stomach, OMG I cannot handle it. I'm not sure whether to curl up the fetal position because she's growing too fast or because I'm dying from heat stroke.
"Did somebody say lunchtime?"

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Sweet Sesame

I'm not just saying it because she's my baby or because I want to publicly compliment my people making skilz, but Sesame is the sweetest baby.

She has recently decided to boycott bottles and she's started a whine that gets VERY annoying VERY quickly so it's not all sunshine and rainbows, but other than that she's the bee knees. (Come back when she's in the terrible twos and we'll see how chipper I am.)

Annabelle and Mr. Lion still sleep in our room at night. 
She takes naps in her crib and I have no doubt she could sleep in her crib through the night, but how will I hold her hand in the middle of the night if she's in another room? She loves having her hand held. 
I was all geared up to move her to her crib when I started listening to a biography of Charles Lindburg's wife. I got to the point where their son was kidnapped FROM HIS BEDROOM and decided that she's never going to sleep anywhere that's not within three feet of me. Bonus- she'll never want to sneak boys into a room she's sharing with her parents.
She LOVES to be held but hasn't been very into a lot of cuddling until lately. I am not complaining. 
We've been reading to her since she was born, but she's starting to pay more attention to the pictures. 
She's our favorite child.

Saturday, August 16, 2014

this did not start off as a review of our screen time

Back in ye olden days of 2010 when I was 10elbees lighter and didn't have gray hair.
We went on a date today! Currently Blogless Stephanie watched the baby so we could go see the One Hundred Feet Journey. Unlike some movie dates in the past, we both understood everything that happened. Our movie viewing history has had some highs and lows.

When we saw a Jason Bourne movie a few years I was so lost I eventually started counting how many pieces of popcorn I ate to entertain myself. The movie didn't even have Jason Bourne in it. It was all about some dude named Aaron Cross so why they didn't name it the Aaron Cross Legacy is beyond me.
About to attend our first ball together.
Look at that face. Christopher could hardly contain his excitement!
The last James Bond movie came out a few years ago on Christopher's birthday. In preparation for it's debut we watched the previous JB movies. Again, the confusion was real. After the first one I had to read the wikipedia page to understand most of what was happening. Thanks to wikipedia, when we watched the last one I was bursting with pride that I knew what was about to happen before Christopher did. He didn't want to know so I had no one to share my joy with. The level of unrealistic things that go on in those movies are unbelievable. Listen. If you fall hundreds of feet off a moving train after being shot, you're dead. I don't care if you're Harrison Ford, you're still going to be dead. Not to mention the scene where he's at a fancy theater talking very loudly into his secret device and nobody shushes him. In what theater would this be acceptable behavior? Not to mention this:
Then there was the time when I was sick as a dog pregnant and we watched the Downton Abbey season finale. I LOVE Downton Abbey but couldn't keep myself awake for the whole episode. I was so upset with myself for falling asleep, with Christopher (how DARE he let me fall alseep) and with my life in general that I was still grumpy about 24 hours later. I was a true joy and delight to live with that week.

I'm not sure how a post intended to be about our romantic date turned into me rehashing movies I don't understand. I'll ponder it while I study wikipedia on the new James Bond movie coming out in 2015.  

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

nothing earth shattering to read here

I haven't had much of interest to discuss lately. If you want to hear how the never ending crisis in the middle east in impacting the socioeconomic scene, I suggest you leave asap. If you want to hear how Sesame lays on her back on her play mat and rotates herself around in a full circle by swinging her legs then you're at the right place. 

* I packed up Annabelle's preemie clothes and the smallest of her newborn clothes this week. I may have cried. What happened to my little ball of squish with the wrinkly face?! How can I get her back?
Sadie understands how I feel.
While we're on the topic of clothes, Sundays outfit was a home run. Ruffle socks AND a pair of my beloved baby shoes. Fun fact: last month these capris were pants. I'm taking advantage of skinny minnie to getting every single wear I can out of her newborn clothes.
* I called the doctor to make Annabelle's four month appointment and very confidently told the receptionist that her name is Allison. When I realized and corrected myself VERY enthusiastically, all I heard on her end were crickets. It was very awkward.

* I hate calling the doctor for every little sniffle and cough the baby has. I'm really trying to promote the fact that I'm not a hypochondriac when it comes to my child's symptoms, thank you very much. And yet we've been to the doctor three times in the last five weeks. For some reason I assumed Christopher operated under the same policy. He does not. I found this out when he asked the doctor something about AB's poor leg circulation (which was a perfectly fine question) and followed it up with "We want to be sure we aren't putting her diaper on too tight." And just like that my ego shattered into a million pieces on the exam room floor. The part of me that has changed 12,416 diapers over the years shriveled up and died.  This office will never again think I have things under control if they're concerned "we" don't know how to put diapers on properly. 

I recently started doing zumba again. Unfortunately nightly klondike bars do not a flat stomach make so I go to zumba and dance in the best way my white self can. At my old zumba I was the best white lady there. I was also the only white lady. This is a zumba toning class so everyone has two little (and I do mean little) 1.2lb weights that make noises when you shake them. I bring 2lb weights because if I can't be the best white lady there I want to be the heavy-weight champion of the class. I was really proud of holding that position for a whole week until I went to the class last night. I was doing my "warm up", aka swinging my arms around in random directions, when I saw myself in the mirror. I looked just like Michael Phelps swinging his arms around before a race and you know what I comment on every time I see him about to swim? How ridiculous he looks. You know who I'm not a fan of? Michael Phelps. I was humbled. All I wanted to do was curl up in a ball and eat 12 klondike bars. 

Monday, August 4, 2014

pass the cough medicine (and also some chocolate)

Allow me to give you a brief update on the medical condition of our family. Annabelle recovered from reflux just in time to start a grand slam cough/sneeze/congestion. I spent the better part of the weekend feeling like I was coming down with a combo of The Plague of 2011* and The Worst 275 Day Illness of My Life, medically known as the time I was pregnant. For the record, I am not pregnant. Christopher dropped one of his weights on his bare foot and now said foot is swollen and purple. In short, we're the very picture of health over here.

* UTI + eColi + cryptosporidium + a heart rate of 143 = The Great Plague

I wish I looked this cute when sick.
She wore this dress to church and everyone was telling me how cute she looked. #obviously
A man came over to me and I assumed he was going to say the same so without really listening to what he said, I said "thank you." Five minutes later I realized he had only said hi, which explains why he looked at me like I said something weird. 
"Why, yes! I DO know that I'm the cutest baby on the block!"

In other recent news, we went to Stone Mountain for a visit with Christopher's family.
Sesame the explorer charting the course to her next meal.
Annabelle met her cousins and there was a lot of excited kissing.  
If going on vacation results in pictures where 2/3 of the family are smiling, then sign me up for one every month. Notice how Annabelle is covering her face like she doesn't want anyone to know she's associated with us. Isn't she a little young to be behaving like that?
Thirty minutes later she was acting all cool with Dad in the gift shop. She said she wants to start a group called Sesame and The Playmat Gang. They do a mean rendition of If You're Happy and You Know It.
"Peace, bros."

Monday, July 28, 2014

four month Annabelle

Cuddling with Mama at the exact moment I turned 4 months old.

Vital statistics: Last week I weighed 11lbs. 10 oz. I don't know my length but Mom says I'm "long", whatever that means.

What's up with my wardrobe: Thanks to the excessive heat I spent much of this month wearing nothing but my birthday suit and a diaper. When I am dressed I look like three million bucks.
Ain't nobody got time for a bow when it's 182* outside.

I enjoy/am mildly amused by: bath time, swimming in my pool, and having my belly kissed. I love to look at the pretty baby in the mirror. Mealtimes continue to be the delight of my life.

Milestones of my young life this month:
* I  met my great grandmother, two cousins and Aunt Stephanie.
* I can grab toys. I'm an expert rattle shaker.
* My hair is getting longer and thicker.
* I will always hold Mr. Lion near and dear to my heart, but there's a new man in my life. His name is Honeypot and I like eating his ears.
* Sometimes I can pull myself in a sitting position when laying on someones lap.
* I've upgraded from swimming in a pan to swimming in a pool and I love it.
* I'm starting to teeth.
* I saw my first fireworks. I was neither fazed nor overly impressed.
* I was told 4,792 times that under no circumstances whatsoever am I allowed to get any bigger.