Wednesday, January 4, 2017

it's all fun and games until you forget you're a mother

I spent part of Monday morning cleaning up a vomit covered child, car seat and sippy cup. I used every single wipe I had. Happy new year to me!

It hasn't been all gagging and throwing up. Our calendar has been quite full. I've become so popular since I moved away! Grandma Connie came up for Christmas and we had a super quick visit on Christmas Eve. Grandma confirmed that you can wear big earring and a big necklace at the same time. She's a true fashion icon.
Last week we decorated gingerbread cookies. I told everyone to "not stress and keep it low key." I did not take my own advice. I made a cookie of Princess Charlotte coming out of church after the Christmas service. My obsession with the royals may need to be reigned in a little. 

Mom got us and Grandma tickets to Disney on Ice for Christmas. It was so good. Annabelle saw the other kids eating giant snow cones from overpriced souvenir cups and kept asking for one. She said, "I'd yike somesign cold, dee-yicious and refreshing." I gave her a bottle of water instead.
She looked like this almost the entire time. It was priceless when she saw Minnie and Mickey. I love that she's young enough that she truly believes it's them and not people in costumes.
I was so impressed with the skaters. I can barely skate but Pumba back there had on FOUR skates. That's why he gets the big bucks and I hope to make it down the stairs without falling.
The show was held at the same arena where Dad I saw saw Josh Groban many years ago and it brought back so many wonderful memories. We sat next to the aisle about 10 rows from the front. At one point Josh walked down the aisle next to us as he was singing and momentarily held my hand. I repeat, WE HELD HANDS. It was one of the best moments of my life. If the security guard hadn't pushed him along I might have proposed. 

Autumn and Joanna came by for lunch one day. We named ourselves The Single Ladies Club back in the day before I got married and Autumn met Nick. Now Joanna and Autumn are both single again but it's too complicated to keep changing the club name to match our relationship statuses. I always think of Katie as my oldest friend but in reality it's Autumn and Joanna. I've known them since they were born. I used to think they weren't cool to hang out with since they're younger than me, but I finally started hanging out with them more when I was around 12 and we've been together ever since. We made our traditional bacon macaroni and cheese with a side of roasted cauliflower. Annabelle wasn't impressed with our meal so I took a DNA sample to find her real mother. No child of mine is allowed to dislike that meal! 

We were too busy showing pictures of our nieces and nephews to take an updated SLC picture, but here's one of Autumn and I from a few years ago when she got a snuggie. I hope someone decorates a gingerbread cookie to look like us.

Last night I went to the movies with Grandma and Janet. We saw Lion and loved it. The scenery was gorgeous and the main character adorable. When I got home I was telling Mom all about it and how it cemented my desire to adopt a little girl from India. I got so caught up in talking about her I forgot I already have a child until Mom said something about Annabelle. Who forgets they have a child?!?! I shouldn't think I can be responsible for a second child when I don't even remember I have one in the next room! And just like that I lost my chance of receiving the 2017 Mother of the Year award.

Saturday, December 31, 2016

let's finish the year on a negative note

Usually this is the time of year where I reflect on moments of the part year that were special or worth remembering. It's a time when I talk about all the sweet things Christopher did or Sesame said. Not this year, folks. Not this year. Instead I bring to you a list of things that annoyed me this year. 

Hamilton. I tend to avoid things others drool over just to be contrary and Hamilton was no exception. For example, I don't spend hours at Target or Starbucks and avoid any and all Apple products. When we were at the beach house over the summer Mom and I started listening to the Hamilton soundtrack and to say I was unimpressed would be an understatement. The hip hop/rap combination was like screeching cats. The least they could have done was not allow the man who played Hamilton have a goatee. Talk about historically inaccurate. I couldn't get past that. People would have been outraged if a musical was made about Rosa Parks and she was played by a white woman with blond hair. 


Celebrity deaths. Can everyone just calm down when an actor or musician dies? Yes it's sad, but unless you knew them personally it's not necessary to light candles and go into mourning. While we're on the subject, I've heard more than one person say something along the lines of "I can't wait until this year is over because too many people have died." I hate to break it to you, but people are going to die in 2017 also. How's this for a bright and cheery post?


The continued Star Wars obsession. Haven't there already been 17 Star Wars movies? Do we need another? I saw it with Aaron last night and I'm here to tell you from personal experience that the answer is no. 


Man buns. 

Bae. This "word" was in circulation before 2016 but it was particularly annoying to me this year. How hard is it to put in the second 'b' and make a real word? If you don't have time for that you don't have time for the bae to whom you are referring. 

Going overboard with instagram stories. Instagram stories are great for nosy people like me who want to know more about others, but I wish people would learn how to use them well. It shouldn't be yet another way for me to see three more pictures of your poorly lit plate of chicken and rice. I still have issues looking at food pictures stemming from when I was pregnant so this near and dear to my heart. 


Justin Beiber. I don't know why he's still around. He should take a year off and learn how to wear a belt.


Youtube ads that can't be skipped. This is especially annoying when Annabelle is watching Veggie Tales and a preview for Game of Thrones comes on. It's very much a first world problem but I live in a first world country.


Body wraps. Please don't ask if I want to wrap my thighs in herb-infused plastic.

Friday, December 30, 2016

Parade of Christmas clothes, edition 3

The best way to spread Christmas cheer is dressing your child for all to see.

I hope 2017 will be the year she finally gets some personality. She's such a wallflower!
Me: Don't you love your new Christmas headband?!
Sesame:
Dress rehearsal for her winter date with Prince George.

She's worn this dress every Christmas of her life. Look how much she grew since last Christmas. If I look any longer I might cry.
Is it obvious I like smocked dresses? I've waited her entire life to put her in a smocked nativity dress and it was worth the wait. I might make her wear it every Sunday between now and next Christmas.

Wednesday, December 28, 2016

Christmas 2016

People are pulling down their Christmas trees and here I am, talking about our Christmas five days later. I like to keep the holly jolly going until well into the new year.

We celebrated our own Christmas at home the weekend before Christmas. We had a North Pole breakfast with snowmen shaped pancakes and Christmas straws in the morning, played in the snow and opened gifts at night. Annabelle gave me a music box that plays Edelweiss which she told me about four days before I opened it. Every time she talked about it she would tell me, "But Daddy said not to tell you 'bout it." She asked for a whistle and a jump rope, both of which she got in her stocking. Christopher bought the whistle and I have a feeling it might accidentally on purpose get temporarily lost it if goes too annoying. 
We went to a Christmas Eve service than made the long commute all the way across the back yard to my aunt and uncle's for Christmas festivities. Sesame was so! excited! about all things Christmas. It wasn't my favorite holiday season in general but she definitely made it better. She was only 9 months old on our last Christmas here so this year she was old enough to enjoy everything.
She's worn this dress 3 years in a row. I hope it still fits when she's 14.
She was having a fantastic hair day.
Aaron passed out the gifts on Christmas morning and this tag stumped us all. We have neither a Cristy or a Della in our family. We're not known for great organization skills on Christmas morning but this takes the cake as the most random.
Annabelle's single stroller wasn't big enough for her ever growing family of babies so Grammy and Grampy got her a double stroller. She quickly learned to maximize space and stuffed in no less than 7 assorted dolls and animals. She pushed it across the yard to Memere's then abandoned all the babies so I was once again on Grandma babysitting duty.
66% of us are smiling so I call this a successful family picture.  
Baby Ivy and I got some good cuddles in on her first Christmas. She is so cute. I wish Daniel and Erika would have stuck her in my stocking!
She knew it was important to do some planks and burn off all that wrapping paper she ate!

Friday, December 23, 2016

To grandmother's house we go

Dad spent the last few days at our house and drove to MA with us yesterday. I'm not going to say he drives too fast, but he drives faster than I do and cut off nearly an hour of the trip. Annabelle sat in the back with Mr. Lion and repeatedly scared me when she'd make comments about not feeling well. I brought two towels in case we had a vomiting incident. This isn't my first travel rodeo! I tried to keep us occupied by asking trivia questions and singing Christmas songs that no one appreciated like they should have. The life of a jukebox is a tough one.

We were home all of 3 minutes before cousin Nick (usually referred to as Pickles) came over, followed quickly by Grandma. AB's newest salutation is a fake sneeze which she did wholeheartedly for Memere. I don't know why she does the things she does. 

Around the time I got engaged I told Grandma I'd like it if she could crochet a baby blanket for me. I knew Grandma wasn't speedy with the crochet hook so I wanted to get my order in early. Three years later, Grandma finished the blanket just in time to bring it to the hospital the day after AB was born. She's slept with it every nap and night since. She asked for it while we watched How the Grinch Stole Christmas last night because she wanted to share it with Memere. She gave Memere a kiss and said "dank you for my banket!" It was so precious.
Memere knows the way to Annabelle's heart. She let her borrow the singing snowmen decoration for the weekend. They've been named Barry and Aurora and she pushes the button to make them sing 24 times an hour.
Her snowman love affair began early in life.
Every year growing up I'd help Grandma make the meatballs for the chicken soup at Christmas and Easter. I don't get to do as many traditions since we live far away, but I got to help with the meatballs this year. I was so excited to make Annabelle a fourth generation meatball roller. She was less interested in rolling them and more interested in grabbing the ones I made and turning them into "a snow monster." 
Elizabeth has finally decided to get her licence. She volunteered to drive us to the grocery store and since I like to think of myself as a superb driver, I offered to give her a few pointers. I gave some tips about programming the radio stations (priorities!) and knowing which button operates which window. It was going well until she turned left into two lanes of oncoming traffic. I remained remarkably calm given the fact my life was flashing before my eyes. Here she is after she almost killed me. The least she could have done was offer to pay for my Dunkin Donuts to make up for it!

Friday, December 16, 2016

the bad, the good and the christmasy

The bad-
This has not been a great two weeks. I feel like every time I try to blog lately it ends up sounding I'm filing complaints with the Board of Life and Why Stuff Happens. But sometimes life isn't all glitter and bunnies (for Christopher a life of glitter would be a nightmare) and that's what I'm here to discuss today. Now is your chance to leave and look at perfect pictures on pinterest.

+ At the end of last week and the beginning of this week Annabelle was in the midst of her second round of bronchitis. Every night was rough. She had night terrors, she couldn't find her pacifier when it was in her hand and she couldn't figure out how to drink from the cup she sleeps with. I was so scared something would happen when I was asleep that I had her lay with me on the guest bed for a while. The next night was the complete opposite. She jibber jabbered until ONE O'CLOCK IN THE MORNING. I cannot tell you the number of times I went in her room to give a piece of my mind about her behavior. She wanted her wand. She wanted to talk about Hungry, Hungry Hippos. She dropped (threw) Appletini out of the crib. She wanted more friends to sleep with. She wouldn't stop flipping the light switch on and off so I had to move the crib a foot away from the wall. It's interesting how bad nights happen when I'm just barely coming around to the idea of maybe sometime having another baby. A child who doesn't let you sleep more than 5 hours a night is the only birth control needed.
+ The pipes under the sink leaked and soaked everything in the cupboard below.
+ I got stuck in a snow storm and it took an hour to the drive 28 minutes home.
+ Annabelle's sleep strike leaked into nap time and she repeated the above nonsense for days.  
+ Every year I wrap presents while watching The Christmas Card. It's a cheesy movie but I love it and look forward to my tradition every year. Annabelle's nap strike reached a peaked on the afternoon I choose to watch it. She yelled to me for two hours. I eventually got her up and in an attempt to help she unorganized my cards and ripped wrapping paper, spilled her milk and knocked over her snack bowl. The whole thing was a disaster. 
+ Sesame dumped all her beads all over the kitchen floor, under the oven, down the cellar stairs and into every corner. I didn't think it through too well when I bought the extra large container of beads.
+ She spilled them again the next day. I've since hidden the beads and might accidentally on purpose forget where they are.
The day I finally checked myself into rehab.
+ We couldn't go to MOPS yesterday because I couldn't get the car out of the driveway due to snow. I've said it before and I'll say it again- I'm from Massachusetts and grew up dealing with snowy driveways. Not counting his 5 years at Fort Drum, Christopher has no snow experience to speak of. My word/advice on the subject should be taken as law and followed. All we have to do when it snows is shovel within an appropriate amount of time so we stay on top of the situation and we'll be able to get in and out of the driveway just fine. It snowed Wednesday night and Christopher said we didn't need to shovel, we'd just drive over the snow. This is what I was thinking on the inside.
Thursday morning I couldn't get out of the driveway. Last night he finally shoveled (or more accurately, "shoveled" because it didn't look that way to me). This morning I got stuck again. I'll spare you the memes of how that made me feel.

MOVING ON. Stay tuned for future installments of airing my grievances.

The good-
+ I love our Christmas trees this year. Nothing makes me happier at the end of the day than to sit on the couch in the quiet with the trees and mantle lit. 

+ One of Annabelle's favorite games for the last few months is wrapping toys and giving them to us or vice versa. She'll wrap them in whatever blanket or bit of paper she can find then makes a production of handing them out and singing Happy Birthday. There's only so many times you can feign enthusiasm for the same toy but it's so sweet. She wrapped these Christmas presents by herself and was so proud. Her favorite part is the tape. She thinks it's important to use half a roll on each gift.

The Christmasy-
+ We decorated our gingerbread house. I'm pleased that no one (read: me) allowed perfectionist or OCD tendencies to get in the way of a good time.
+ I'm glad I have a child who loves all things Christmas as much as I do. She says "YOOK, MOMMY!!! IT'S A  _______! I YOBE IT!" every single time she sees something Christmas related. It's like the first time every time.
+ The next movie on our Christmas watch list is my personal favorite- It's a Wonderful Life. If only I had been born 60 years earlier I would have been Mrs. Jimmy Stewart in a heartbeat.