Monday, September 24, 2012

please take note if your name is featured below

Dear Walmart,
   I appreciate that at least two of your fine establishments have been near each home I’ve occupied in the last year. I always know where to find rollback prices when I need them. What I don’t appreciate is each Walmart (grand total of SEVEN) has a different layout. That’s seven layouts, for those who don’t feel like doing math. It takes me three times as long to do my shopping when I go to where I think bread should be and find diapers instead. All I’m asking for is a little continuity.
   While you’re at the board meeting discuss to the aforementioned problem, feel free to discuss the need to introduce some new baby shoes into your stores. You’ve had the same styles across four states for the last year. 
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Dear Lowes and Home Depot, 
    If you’re wondering what happened to all your paint chips, look no further.
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Dear Allison,
   I miss you. Please come visit me asap. Feel free to bring Elmo and all your clothes because I'd like you to stay a long  time (read: forever).
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Dear Christopher,
   I’m sorry for choosing late o’thirty when you were lying in bed as the perfect time to tell you my history with rollercoasters and amusement parks.   
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Dear boy smoking by the gas tanks,
   You might want to relocate.

9 comments:

Jamie said...

All those paint swatches give me anxiety! I hate painting!

Karen said...

My Lowe's and Home Depot are wondering the same thing too. I also agree that the young man smoking by the gas tanks might want to move. That's a smart observation :)

hmb said...

Zomg....the pic at the end has me rollin'. Too much...

Terri Lynn Grothe said...

wow, are u painting the whole neighbor hood :p

have fun :)

Lisa said...

with all those paint chips, we have GOT to see before and after shots!!!!

Molly said...

I am always grabbing paint chips from Lowes. I try to be sneaky about it, but I am pretty sure they know what I am doing.

Jen said...

I can't wait to own a home so I can paint!!

❈ Annie - Blonde Glambition ❈ said...

The paint chips are hilarious..I love it! And the commentary for the smoking boy...spot on :) I couldn't agree more about the Walmart layouts. Nothing more frustrating than it taking twice as long to find a few things on what was supposed to be a quick trip to the store.

Jessica Lynn said...

Hi! Coming over from the mil-blogging FB page! I agree 110% about the Walmart layouts! There's NO need for them to be so completely different! I definitely laughed out loud at the guy smoking...and people wonder why stupid things happen.