Thursday, June 6, 2013

apparently it's Marriage Issues Week over here

It seems I've let you all down with my meat thawing methods.

I appreciate you weighing in and informing me in no uncertain words that MEAT SHOULD NEVER BE THAWED IN WARM WATER! Christopher, who never says anything about blog comments, informed me that more than 7 comments agreed with his methods. He was delighted to think he won this argument. (And to the two of you who said method one was right but go with method two because it's easier, you just got yourselves a new best friend.)

But Christopher didn't really win as I have no intentions of changing my meat thawing methods.

It's not that I want anyone to get sick, it's just that people in my family thaw meat in certain ways and no one (and I do mean NO ONE) has ever gotten sick. In the combined 223 years that my immediate family has been thawing meat, not a one of us has ever gotten so much as a sniffle. Besides, I tried Christopher's method of thawing under cold running water once and it lead to the entire kitchen being flooded. But fret not, people of the internet who one day may eat at my table. My meat is always thoroughly cooked which, in my mind, cancels out any food-borne illnesses. (It's worth noting that I was struck with e.coli during the Great Plague of 2011 and I did not contract it from questionably thawed meat. I'd say how I got it but I like to keep things clean and happy around here.)

You were so helpful in the chicken dilemma that I'd like to bring another issue to your attention. Namely, Christopher is unable to pronounce some names properly.

Example:
Me: "What is your mom's name?"
Christopher: "Ginny."
Me: "What is the name of Katie's sister who's training to be a doula?"
Christopher: "Ginny."

But here's the problem: Katie's sister isn't named Ginny. Her name is Jennie and Christopher is unable to hear the difference between the two. I am constantly (because we frequently have this conversation in hopes he'll see the light) saying that Virginia and Jennifer are totally different names and then I launch into a phonetics lesson. This usually leads us to how he pronounces "lawyer" which eventually leads us into a discussion of the Civil War. It's like everything leads to the Civil War. The Civil War without fail leads to me saying, "Well, my side won!" Christopher then launches into a speech about the dishonorable acts done by the Union to which I reply, "I personally did not do those things! But either way, we still won!"

Sarah and Christopher, still fighting the Civil War after 148 years.

In conclusion (and you were thinking I'd never stop talking), I found this picture this morning and couldn't be more delighted. It's scientific proof that those who live in the portion of the country who did not fare so well during the Civil War (I hope you noticed my diplomatic wording) pronounce "lawyer" differently than my side.

See? It all goes back to the Civil War.

7 comments:

Allison said...

I will eat meats in your house any day of the week. Method two for lyfe.

While my husband was in the shower (after being in the field the last three days), I bombarded him with this, "When you wish someone a happy Christmas you say?" "Meah-ree." "Jesus' mother's name was?" "Meah-ree." "You go to the church and say vows to be together forever you get...?" "Meah-reed. Al, those three words are the same. What do you want?" He's from Oregon. I'm from the great state of the meatball hero.

Are we living parallel lives?

Laura Darling said...

Loyer. All the way. Did you see this whole article about all the different words? Fascinating!!!

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Julie said...

Our conversations frequently turn to the Civil War. To make matters worse, my mom love to say "Julie's great great great grandfather was a Massachusetts abolitionist!" My husband goes into his tirade about northern aggression as he wears his Nantucket Red shorts. I think his arguments are null and void when that occurs.

Ashley said...

Hehe this post cracked me up! My hubby and I tease each other about the word "wash". He "warshes" the dishes... I "WASH" the dishes. :)

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