roar, roar Annabelle is four

The best day of Annabelle's year finally arrived. Birthday party day.

This was the first year she was very invested in the birthday party process. This lead to small amounts of friction between us. She wanted to help put up decorations one way but I wanted them to be put up another way. We compromised by visiting Party City and buying Daniel Tiger-themed plates, napkins and party hats. (Let's be honest. Going to Party City wasn't much of a hardship for me. It's a color-coordinated heaven over there.) I've always had a fairly strong anti-character dishes policy but it wasn't my party. I have to remind myself of that all the time. IT'S NOT YOUR PARTY, SARAH.


She had originally requested a tiger theme but a few weeks ago she specified it should be Daniel Tiger. She later brought up she wanted to change the theme to the ocean but I don't allow the theme to be changed after March 1st. I need an appropriate amount of time to order my fancy party straws. We had a broad rainbow color theme and it looked a little fiesta-ish but it was very cute. 

Backwards #4 will forever annoy me when I see this picture.

As per the usual, I was doing preparations until the 10:59. I wasn't even dressed with makeup on until 10:48. Mom always rushed around like crazy before our parties growing up so it seemed like a real mom thing to do. AB gave me a hug at lunch and said "This is the best party ever" so the hours decorating the cake and cleaning were worth it. 

One of my biggest worries about moving was Annabelle having to find new friends. She had Aubrey and all her little friends in NY. When we moved at the end of January I knew she'd have to find friends fast in order to have a party. Her party is so important to her and I would have hated for her to not have one. I was close to bribing children from the playground to come over. She had three little friends come and it was perfect. They played red light green light, duck duck goose, and tag. She always asks to play those games with us but have you tried to play duck duck goose with two people? It's pointless.

Daniel looks a little wonky but Sesame said he looked beautiful.

Pre-present huddle. "Ok, guys. I'll handle the bags. You and you get the tissue paper. You're in charge of the presents once they're opened. Any questions? Everybody got it? Don't let me down."

I've cared for her for 1,418 days. I've clothed her in smocked dresses. I've spent hours of my life at the hospital with her. I feed her from my own body for months on end. IS IT TOO MUCH TO ASK that she smile for a picture?

She has a long history of not smiling for the camera. Good thing she's cute. 

four.

My favorite child turned 4 today.

It was a busy year for Sesame Pie. She started going to MDO for two mornings a week. She visited urgent care after spraying bleach in her face and swallowing a quarter. She got a bead stuck in her nose. She visited Maine, Massachusetts, Rhode Island, Texas, Arkansas and several east coast states between New York and Georgia. 

She loves food, staying in hotels, watching shows and eating snacks. She loves making up games and correcting us when we don't follow the rules she's always changing. She never turns down a chance to go swimming, eat chocolate or have a dance party. Several times a week we dance to songs from The Greatest Showman. Every day she plans a birthday party for one of her friends. She loves a good time.



She's done very well with our recent move. She's mentioned her old friends a few times but overall she's adjusted very well. She has mentioned several times how she wishes Old Mr. Jim could come visit. Today she reminded me how he would share his lunch from McDonalds with her.

Her favorite shows right now are Creative Galaxy, Boz the Bear, Veggie Tales and Sarah & Duck. She listens to "sweet music" while she goes to sleep. For a while it was hymns but the last few weeks it's been a Bing Crosby Christmas cd every single night.
She still has her imaginary friend family of Goldbug, Garby, Carla and Azelia. Each one has a unique personality. Their lives get more complicated by the day and sometimes she'll ask me to make baby Azelia stop crying. 

Sometimes I get tired of being her primary caregiver but (generally) I like spending every day with her. She's still my favorite girl and I think I'll keep her around for a few more years.

school time with Sesame Pie

Hello.

How was your weekend?

I walked around town without know that the camisole I wore to cover my bra had slipped down and the entire front right of my bra was hanging out.

I also learned the reason our clothes hadn't been getting clean in the laundry. I washed the same clothes multiple times, but the stains wouldn't come out. I thought we needed a new washing machine. Turns out I had been using fabric softener instead of laundry detergent. The bottle of softener was in the same spot I keep the detergent and I didn't bother reading the label.

I bought a 62'' plastic pool from Toys R Us. As I carried it across the parking lot, the wind caught the pool and jerked and pulled me around in front of all the cars. I could barely keep ahold of it. I must have looked like a drunk woman.

I hope you feel better about yourself now.

Despite the issues I have navigating life, I've decided it's time to get a little more in-depth with AB's education. We read a book about France and found a picture of Monet's waterlilies.  I got out the paint and had her copy one of the paintings. If you're thinking that was a brilliant idea, I agree. If you're thinking painting a masterpiece sounds like a good way to use to the endless hours of the day, once again I'd agree. We have a long history of his paintings in our house so it seemed fitting to pass it on to this new and impressionable generation.

She calls the original artist Moooooee-naaaaay.

Original artwork by Sesame Monet

The next morning she told Christopher she didn't like Jackson Pollock's art. She and I hadn't discussed JP so I was impressed with her knowledge. I'd like to thank Creative Galaxy and Amazon Prime for teaching her about art while I lie on the bed resting make soap from scratch and sew quilts. For the record, I agree with her. I think Jackson Pollock is given too much credit. A two-year-old can throw paint against a canvas.

"Ok, Mom. I wrote a list of safety things to keep us safe when we go on a trip that we need to be safe."

Physical education for the day. Does rain count as her shower for the day?



I'll never look at a Hawaii quarter the same way again

I have a long history of over-sharing our health issues on this corner of the interwebs and I don't plan on stopping today. Either X out or settle in.

After AB swallowed the quarter on Saturday, we had x-rays for the next three days. Our pediatrician poked her stomach, drew a diagram of her insides on the table and told me it was probably in there for good. Everyone and their mother said she'd pass it on her own, but she refuses to poop on the potty on a good day, let alone when she knows there's something inside her that needs to come out. She refused to poop and the quarter refused to leave its cozy spot in her stomach. We were, both literally and figuratively, at an impasse.  

Wednesday morning she said her belly was hurting. The doctor had told me that if she complained of stomach pain to go straight to the hospital. I got us breakfast, packed a few things in a bag and called his office to say we were going to the close children's hospital an hour and a half away. He called back and said no one there would treat her since it wasn't an emergency. He also told me that the day before but I thought they'd have to treat her since her stomach was hurting. According to him, this area is under-served for pediatric care. Doctors often push pediatric surgeries onto other doctors. I thought the whole thing was ridiculous and very annoying. Why become a doctor if you're only going to pick and chose which child's health is important? I know a swallowed quarter is NOTHING like a child with a heart condition or a cancer, but it's not normal to have a coin in your body. If your body doesn't pass it on its own that means it needs some help.

Back to Wednesday. Our doctor's friend at a children's hospital 5 hours away said his people would remove it. He called me and was so sweet. He said even though it would be a simple, very common procedure it didn't mean she was any less important than the other cases. He sounded just like George W. Bush, which I loved. After lunch we drove up to his hospital. Christopher asked if I wanted to listen to a lecture series on communication and business practices with people of other cultures. When do I ever turn down a lecture series? The answer is always, unless it's a lecture on the latest and greatest potato chip flavors. I said yes and it was actually kind of interesting. Annabelle must have thought the lecturer was getting too much of my attention because she had an accident in her car seat.
Sesame was so excited to be staying in a hotel. She loves a good hotel trip. I think it was all part of her master plan. She wanted to stay a hotel and thought swallowing a quarter was her ticket there. It worked.

We were at the hospital all day yesterday. Everyone was very kind and helpful. I volunteered at a children's hospital for five years so it was odd to be on the parent side of things. I was always the one leading people around or unlocking doors with my fancee key. We had to wait several hours between the x-ray and the procedure. Annabelle wasn't allowed to eat since midnight on Wednesday and Christopher joined her as an act of solidarity. My support did not reach that level. If I don't eat I get hangry and that doesn't help anyone. At lunch time I got myself down to McDonalds and had some French fries. French fries or chips have always been my comfort food. No wonder I can't lose weight. Sesame mentioned a few times she was hungry, but she did really well. The procedure went well and they were able to get it out without making an incision in her stomach. The doctor said 8 out of 10 children who come in because of swallowed objects are boys. I don't know if I should be proud of her for representing the girls or not.

She was so loopy and droopy when we went to see her in recovery that I almost cried. She was shaking and saying she "couldn't stop being wiggly." They had turned on Madagascar for her and she snuggled with Daddy and Mr. Lion while the anesthesia left her body. She saw that movie for the first time a few weeks ago at the Y and came home talking about "the gassy car" movie. It took us ages to figure out what she meant. "The gassy car movie with the giraffe and the elephant!"

After the procedure I popped into Carter's near the hospital and bought a few things as retail therapy/rewarding myself for surviving the past week. I only went in for a bathing suit but I came out with 6 things. They were all 40-60% off so I practically earned us money.

To wrap up this (very boring) novel, I can think of nothing better than what Michelle said. "Annabelle knows how to put her money where her mouth is." I can't believe I didn't think of that myself.

The offending foreign object. It will either be hung up on the wall or used to pay hospital bills.



The Human Piggybank

It started out as a normal weekend but things rapidly went south. It turned into a weekend full of Those Days.

We didn't do anything out of the ordinary- did some school, went to Home Depot, planted flowers, cleaned the house- but everything was going wrong. Christopher brought up buying a gun to shoot the snakes which reminded me again that I wish we didn't have to move here. Annabelle's nose was bleeding and wouldn't stop. She acted up in the store. None of the errands got done. I tried to glue something and the cover came off and the glue went everywhere. The lettuce went bad. A lizard got in the house. It went on and on. None of it was a big deal on its own but combined, it was too much. (I lie. The lizard was a big deal.)

I went to Ulta and things started to look up. I went to Walmart and was about to check out when Christopher called and said, "Everything is fine but..." I HATE when I get those calls. Once he called to say, "Don't panic, but I passed out and drove off the road." My mom does the same thing. "Everything is fine, but Elizabeth fell off the roof and we're in an ambulance on the way to the hospital." DON'T SAY EVERYTHING IS FINE IF IT OBVIOUSLY IS NOT FINE.

This time was Annabelle. She was playing in the living room when she put a coin in her mouth and choked on it. Christopher's biggest nightmares are snakes and choking. He heard her gagging and rushed in to see his nightmare coming to life. He wasn't sure if she had actually swallowed it or if she had coughed it up but he was bringing her to urgent care to be checked. When he called I was standing by the peanut butter. I just sighed and thought "Of course. Of course, something like this would happen today."  Part of me felt like a bad mom for not instantly running to urgent care, but the situation seemed to be under control (she was breathing and talking, etc) and I didn't want to go through all the work of getting the groceries again. I took the groceries home, grabbed her shoes and meet them at the urgent care. I also brought a bow because I was positive Christopher wouldn't have remembered to put one on her if he had gone out the door without shoes. She couldn't be in a compromised health situation and not look cute!

When I got to urgent care they were having the x-ray done. Sesame came back in the room full of stories of having a picture taken of her belly through her dress ("I didn't eben hab to take my clothes off!") and how the man drew on her belly with a marker. "But not a marker like I hab! A flat one." Christopher looked like a man who had faced his worst enemy and barely escaped. The x-ray showed that she had indeed swallowed a coin. It wasn't a dime or even a penny. It was a quarter. Go big or go home. She didn't pass the quarter last night so we went back today for another x-ray. The coin is still hanging out in the same spot in her stomach. If it doesn't work its way out tonight, we'll have another x-ray and see her doctor tomorrow. 

I always wanted to swing by urgent care after church. 

We are so thankful it's "only" a foreign object in her stomach. It could have gotten lodged in her airways and we'd be in a very different situation right now. She was able to do the Easter egg hunt at church that she's been talking about for days. She was running around with 25 cents hanging out in her stomach.

I didn't go to the emergency room until my teen years. Sesame Pie has been three times in the last 6 months. She better not keep this up! If she does I'm going to speak to management about getting myself a pay increase. Hopefully, it will be more than 25 cents.

Sesame Says, Volume 5

These little stories and quirks most likely won't be funny to anyone else, but they made me laugh in the moment and I want to remember them. 

Annabelle is very interested in the day of the week and the date. Once hearing that it was March 1st she drew an invitation and planned a March 1st party. She is my child. Every event deserves a party.

A few weeks ago, Christopher and Sesame were making a big Saturday breakfast. He told AB to ask me if I wanted to pick something off their menu or create an a la carte breakfast. She bounced over and said, "Do you want to eat an olive cart?''

She's begun referring to anything less than ice cold milk as "dead milk.''

I heard her telling our neighbor Olivia about the characters in The Greatest Showman. When she got to the character played by Zac Efron she sighed, gazed out to the mid-distance and said, "He's just really beautiful." I almost cried from laughter. 

She loves to drink out of a metal measuring up like a minor from ye olden days. 

Praise the Lord and all the angels, she's finally potty trained. It only took 10 months, not that I'm counting or bitter. The first time she peed on the potty was pure coincidental timing. I yelled and screamed, clapped and jumped. I was so excited. She stared me down. "Mom. You don't need to be so excited about this." YES, I DO. I LOST SLEEP OVER THIS. I WILL CLAP ALL I WANT. 

When she saw that Christopher put strawberries and apples in the salad she said "Well. My parents have odd ways."

Shortly after we moved in I was sent an indoor tree. I love it. It's become a real point of pride in my life. I feel like such an adult with a large plant in the house. Part of me has wondered if it makes our living room look like a dentist office but I smash that thought far, far down.

Guess who else likes the tree. Specifically, attempting to climb the tree. This little goober.

Just when I thought her Minnie Mouse phase was over she went out in public like this.

snakes and bugs and more

 We started the week as we always do by going to church. I dropped Annabelle off in her classroom and asked if she needed to use the potty before I left. She said no. The nice lady in charge of the children's programs told Annabelle she could tell her if she needed the potty and she'd be happy to take her. AB nodded her head and said ok. Out of nowhere, a second lady in the room turned to Annabelle and demanded, "Say 'yes, ma'am.'" I stared at her so hard I'm surprised I didn't burn a hole through her. I'm fine with friends and family correcting Annabelle if need be, but  I don't know that woman. Annabelle didn't do anything wrong. It's not like she hit someone! That would have been a reasonable reason to correct my child. I told Christopher about it and he did not share in my huffiness.

Later that evening, Christopher went out back to talk to the neighbor. Said neighbor told him that if the grass isn't kept short enough, we'll be dealing with rattlesnakes and cooper heads in the warmer weather. POISONOUS SNAKES IN MY YARD. Mike Peedro the ex-convict neighbor told me about the rattlesnakes when we moved in but he doesn't always tell the truth. A reliable neighbor passed on the information this time, so I believe him and have vowed to never walk in my yard again. Our grass is almost a foot long so there's probably a hold herd (flock? group? huddle?) of snakes out there. Christopher did share my negative views about this situation. 

As if snakes in the yard and frogs in/on my house isn't enough, on Monday the landlord and her father came over to inspect a hole by the house. Richard stared at the hole for .6 seconds and announced, "Well. Looks like you have an armadillo under there." 

At this point I shouldn't be surprised by anything. If someone tells me a lion lives across the street I'll just smile and nod. Richard said to put a board over the hole. Seems to me that will present a new problem. What if the armadillo gets trapped and dies under there? What then, Richard? I hope you have a plan for that scenario.

No sooner had Richard left then Nine Fingered Larry showed up. The bathroom floor has water seeping through it which obviously is a problem. Larry came over a few weeks ago to fix an electrical problem. When he came that time he said he wasn't an electrician but he knew a few things about electricity. I know a few things too. For example, if not handled properly bad things can happen. Maybe that's why he's missing a finger. He didn't fix anything that time so I didn't expect it to be any different when he was in my home this week. He said he wasn't a plumber but he was going to look at the bathroom anyway. I showed him to the bathroom where he gave me a brief lesson in pipe location and other things I didn't fully understand thanks to his accent. He talks so slow and makes comments I don't understand. He finally diagnosed the problem. The toilet paper holder had fallen off the wall because of drywall issues. Christopher patched the hole but had yet to reattach the holder. According to Larry, when Christopher screwed the holder back in he hit a pipe which lead to leaking in the floor. Except Christopher had not screwed anything into the wall, which I pointed out to Nine Fingered Larry. That really took the wind out of his sails. He sauntered out, promising that the real plumbers would be by soon.

The plumbers did indeed come by and leave this lovely souvenir in our wall.

It really fits the aesthetic I'm going for in this house. Between that, the snake repellant and the peppermint oil/water mixure I use on the frogs it's becoming a real Southern Living home around here.

small town USA

Do come along on a tour of our new town. Don't blink or you'll miss it.

Did you catch it? There's a gas station to the left of the brick building and a police station to the right of the blue awning, but that's it. City hall, a lawyer, police station and gun shop. I wonder how much overlap there is between them.

I've always been fascinated by names and there is no shortage of unique names here. So far I've met a Sharetta, Shamonica, and a Nostalgia. When we were at Walmart, I saw a poster with photos and names. I thought it was a missing person board. I was reading the names and the name January stood out. I wouldn't name my child January, but people use the months May and June as names. The last name was Winner which seemed like a confidence-boosting name. "I'm Miss Winner and I'm here to stay." Anyway. As I read more names I saw February Winner. That's when I realized it was an employee reward chart, not a board of missing people. I should not be taking myself out in public.

Me, about myself, 700 times a week.

The first few weeks we were here we attended a mega church. We're not mega-church people so while the people were nice enough (they've sent two separate groups to our house to visit), we moved on to greener pastures, or in this case, a smaller church. The church we've been to the last three weeks is much more our preferred size and style. I filled out a visitor card the first week and within three days, five people emailed me and welcomed us to the church. They have a very enthusiastic welcoming committee.

The following card was in the back of the pew in front of us on our first visit. Adolf Zitler, Berlin, Germany. I wonder if he also visited the mega church. 

For reasons I don't understand, many of the men in the church refer to their wives as their brides. Technically, a wife is a bride, but I don't think the term needs to be used 15 years after the wedding when "wife" works just fine. The pastor was talking to us and said to Christopher, "Does your bride work?" I was standing right there and the first thing that popped into my head was, "Who's Christopher's bride?" I AM. HE WAS TALKING ABOUT ME. 

I should not be responsible for raising a child.