Monday, June 4, 2012

pickles and motorsickles

You will never believe how I spent Saturday (besides sleeping in three hours). I spent it on the back of a motorcycle. Or as Arlo Guthrie likes to say, a moooooootersickle. 

(This is the point in the story where people always say to me, "Christopher has a motorcycle? Why didn't you tell me that??" I simply didn't know you wanted to know, but now you do so we shall move on.) 

It was only the second time I had ever been on the motorcycle, and my first time on the road. I spent the first half of the ride holding on for dead life and closing my eyes at every little turn because I was so nervous. When my eyes were open, I had to bite my tongue so I wouldn't be the backseat rider shouting things like, "DO YOU SEE THE GUY CROSSING THE ROAD 500 YARDS AHEAD??? DON'T HIT HIM!!" Christopher was a wonderful driver(steerer? person operating the machine?), I was just slightly paranoid by the thought that I might see some of my life flash before my eyes at any moment. We stopped for a relaxing picnic in the park and, thanks once again to Arlo, I started singing, "I don't want a pickle, just want to ride my mooooootersickle." Except that a pickle really would have been a lovely addition to the picnic.

Please ignore the giant helmet that makes me look like some sort of alien. 
Our next stop was the Harley store to buy more a more appropriate headgear. The saleslady (bejeweled and bedecked in Harley Davidson jewelry) asked me what type of helmet I was looking for. Did I want whole, 3/4, or 1/2? That was a question I was not capable of answering, so I simply replied that I needed to see the options. I figured that sounded slightly more intelligent than saying, "I really have no idea. Just give me something that covers my head and looks good with a wide variety of clothing." She put several on my head and explained how this one was aerodynamic and that one was ecofriendly and this one will make you want to ride for days. It was very hard for me to stay serious during this because I never even considered riding a motorcycle, yet here I was purchasing a helmet! The whole thing struck me as very funny. I just about lost it when the lady said, "It's good to spend the money on a high quality helmet that will last for years DOWN THE ROAD." I almost died.

After the Harley store (I believe the die-hards call it a "shop"), we rode around some before stopping at the shooting range to practice for a test Christopher is taking. (Could the day have been any more outside of my normal Saturday routine?) We went to see What to Expect When You're Expecting after that because we needed a little bit of girly in our day. Honestly, I enjoyed the riding (mostly because I didn't fall off) and the shooting (mostly because I didn't kill anyone by accident). We hadn't been able to spend a whole day doing nothing except hanging out together and it was so fun.

When I got home, I discovered that it was a very good fan mail day! Daniel and Erika sent me this beautiful canvas for my birthday! We don't have a hammer so I had to use the bottom of a pepper grinder to bang the nail into the wall.
Sweet Laura sent me this very exciting birthday package! I oohed and ahhed about everything. Believe me when I say I have studied the W & K book like nobodys business.
We ended the day by visiting with people at the American Legion. Apparently I now spend my days on a motorcycle and my nights with senior citizens. It's almost like I don't even recognize my own life anymore. At least I have an eco-friendly, aerodynamic, goes-with-everything helmet with which to meet these crazy days.

1 comment:

Barbara said...

You are a riot, my girl (in case you didn't already know)