it's just a matter of time before hgtv asks us to have our own show

We've been on a roll lately when it comes to home improvement. Granted it's been a very slow roll because we tend to start a simple project one weekend and finish it five weekends later. 

In January we painted our bathroom blue. Here it is before in all its yellow glory. 

Last weekend we added stripes. Naturally we each had a different idea of how to measure the stripes so they'd be straight. I'd never painted stripes before but I'd read three stripe painting articles on Pinterest and Pinterest is always knows what's what! Christopher didn't read any articles and had his own ideas. I went along with his method so that I could say I told you so before we moved on to my method because I'm a very cooperative wife. Much to my sorrow amazement, his method worked well and all the stripes are perfectly straight. Pay no attention to the way the stripe all the way to the right is leaning. Just another example of subpar photography. 

Christopher's parents gave us their kitchen table and chairs when they moved and I recovered the chairs. The chairs were off white not greenish as it looks.

The chair on the left is actually green, not off white as it appears. I was too tired to go ALL THE WAY down the stairs and take a more accurate picture. 

We didn't do anything to this hutch other than buy it, but it's worth mentioning because I've been looking for a hutch for our entire marriage. I need somewhere to put those special plates we never eat off! I love it.

And finally, I bought a small dresser to put in the hallway upstairs to keep some extra baby things in. I wanted to go all Aggie go I took it apart and redid it. 

I still have to get knobs for it but like I said, it's a slow roll. They'll probably go on sometime mid-August.

This is neither here nor there, but the basket on top holds diapers and wipes. I don't care if Sesame ends up being Carter and has to wear girly diapers because these are so pretty. If I'm going to be changing diapers I might as well like how they look. 

Watch Sesame Grow, week 34

Edition: The tshirt, no makeup, I have the plague self portrait

As told by Sesame

Size of baby: They tell me I'm the size of a cantaloupe. Anyone know what that is?

Fun fact: I don't know if I'm getting bigger or my Hotel Womb room is getting smaller, but things are a little tighter in here than they used to be.
Size of mother: I don't know. I've never seen her.

What's on the menu: As a general rule food down here is only so-so but I had lasagna the other day and it was probably the best thing at this restaurant since I arrived (potato chips being a close second). My mom kept saying she hasn't eaten than much in months. I believe it. She eat pretty much the entire pan. (Editor's note- I hate to toot my own culinary horn, but it was the bomb dot com of lasagnas. The last time I ate that much was last summer aka pre-Sesame.)

Worst part of the week: People (not to name names but I'm thinking specifically of my parents) are always poking me in the eye. I don't think they mean to, but they do it almost every time they feel Mom's belly and say, "There's the head!" I HAVE EYES IN MY HEAD YOU KNOW.
Best part of the week: Story time! New books! Dad's a good reader. He always tells me about the pictures.

Other things I have to say: My mom's not kidding about having the plague. In fact, I think she's making light of the situation because when she coughs it's like an earthquake down here. 

Dad has a habit of putting his face up to the wall of my hotel room and saying, "Hellllloo, baby! It's your daddy!" I appreciate that he always identifies himself, but sometimes it sounds like he's yelling at me because he's so close. "HELLLLLOO, BABY! IT'S YOUR DADDY!" No wonder I jump when he talks. 

Speaking of him talking, Mom always tells him when she thinks I'm not moving enough. Can't a kid have a few hours of rest?? He'll get down on my level (probably the only time Mom is taller than him) and tell me to move around a little more. I'm very obedient so I always listen, but then sometimes Mom complains that I'm moving too much and it hurts. What does the woman want me to do? Can't she make up her mind?

Finally, is it just me or does my dad have a really long torso and my mom no torso at all? I'm beginning to get a little concerned about who I'll take after.

looks like I want to live in the past forever

Every so often I have lengthy conversations with myself about topics ranging from whether I'll bite the bullet and highlight my hair (doubtful) to the likelihood of any political candidate I vote for wining (through the roof guaranteed not to happen as I'm a bad luck charm for anyone seeking office.). One of my favorite topics is which ancient technology inventions I'd like to see make a comeback.

First up, the answering machine. I LOVED the answering machine and was so excited when we'd come home and see the red light blinking. I'd race to beat the rest of the family and WOULD NOT REST unless I pushed the play button first. No one was every as interested as I was, but I still ran. I could have walked slower than a sloth and still beat the crowds. One of the few messages I ever received was from a clown at the circus we had just attended. Apparently the clown was a relative and someone thought it would be a fun moment. In reality it was slightly creepy.

I realize all cell phones have voice mail, but voice mail isn't the same as an answering machine in my mind. On an answering machine you can hear messages left for other people and, for an admittedly nosy person, it can be a GOLDMINE of information. Not to mention that voice mail usually requires a passcode which really throws a wrench into listening to messages intended for others.

Second, a real telephone. The kind of phone that plugs into the wall, has a curly cord, a dial tone, and an automated lady who says "Your call cannot be completed as dialed. Please hang up and try again". In fact, one of my favorite parts about staying in a hotel (besides the free newspaper) is getting to hear the dial tone on the desk phone. Call me an old lady but I like my newspapers and dial tones.

I really mourn the fact that we don't have a wall phone. I bring it up every time we move but the we move too much, we already have two phones so don't need three, yada yada yada. I still think it will be good for our future children to learn how to use a curly cord phone outside of a replica in a museum.

The hydrangea phone is pretty awesome too.

Third, the cd. I know technically cd's are still around, but I feel they've lost a lot of their luster. Christopher is all about the ipod (which I do enjoy), but I really enjoy cd's and will continue to use them until they die. Besides, ipods don't come with the little booklets like cd's do and for me that's half the fun of buying a new cd. 

Fourth and finally, the VCR. I never knew how much I liked vcr's until I didn't have one. Pressing rewind and watching the characters shoot backwards up stairs or unfall off a cliff brought me almost as much enjoyment as watching the movie forwards. Much like the telephone, I'm campaigning we get a vcr. Salvation Army and Goodwill always have 12 million VHS tapes for literally pennies which means this will be the cheapest invention ever to resurrect.

For what it's worth, I'm in the market for a phonograph. If anyone has one hanging around I'd be glad to take it off your hands.

It would look wonderful in our living room.

the family that visits the fire station together may or may not stick together

Christopher put the baby's car seat in on Sunday.

I stood around reading the manual while he talked about how the activity was stressing him out. Good times all around! I hate reading manuals but I felt it was the responsible parent thing to do. It was probably more helpful than my speech about not liking car seats until the child is old enough to buckle/unbuckle himself. 

We drove down to the fire station to have them inspect our work because have I mentioned the responsible parent thing? Not to mention that the car seat was flopping all around which seemed just a little unsafe. The front door of the fire station was locked so we walked around back. The back door was unlocked but the place looked dead so naturally Christopher walked right in and started poking around. This would be a good time to point out that the 911 system in our town is less than stellar. They're pretty much a 9-5 operation that takes the weekends off. I wish I was kidding. Based on this knowledge I wasn't surprised no one was around. I stood by the door while Christopher looked for someone then decided I didn't want to be charged as an accomplice if he got in trouble for wandering the building. I vowed to stay with him in sickness and in health, not situations of possible arrest. I fled the scene with a clean conscience. 

Just as I was walking away from the door a fire truck pulled up. I didn't know what else to do so I avoided eye contact and made it seem as if I was VERY INTENT of fixing my hair. In other words, I tried to look completely sweet and innocent. When I got to the car I realized it was locked but never fear! The window was down so I reached in and unlocked it. Everyone knows the best way to protect the new car seat you just paid an arm and a leg for is to leave the car locked with the window down. 

In what is the most anticlimactic ending to a story in the history of stories, the firemen weren't upset about a law-abiding citizen wandering their halls. They looked at the car seat in all it's floppy glory and declared it was made that way. "The weight of the infant will hold it down." Well let's hope we have a 16 pound infant* because a tiny 4 pounder won't do much.

The fire chief did point out that generally the police station is the place to visit in times of car seat questions. I told Christopher that but yet we ended up at the fire station. I never vowed to not keep track of how many times I am right during our marriage, so another point for Team Sarah. 

*I am so totally kidding about the 16 pounder. I never in a million years want to deliver a baby that large. 

Watch Sesame Grow, week 33

Edition: We took the show on the road to the baby's room

Size of baby: Almost four lbs or so I hear from the Baby Bump emails I get every week. I haven't done additional research to back this up. 

Fun fact: The baby likes to hang out with it's head on the left side of my stomach. This probably means I poke it in the eye whenever I touch it. 

Size of mother: Up about 2.5 el bees since my appointment last month. Grand total of 141.2. 

What's on the menu: Sweet potato fries.

Worst part of the week: Flying back from Massachusetts. If I had to sit for one more hour I probably would have gone crazy and/or had a meltdown. Which are basically the same thing. My apologizes to my row mates who had to deal with ALL THE MOVING and ALL THE OPENING OF GUM WRAPPERS in order to ward off back problems and nausea. My life is so glamorous.
Best part of the week: Getting more Sesame's room done (pictures forthcoming!) and seeing tiny little bits of hair sticking up off the baby's head on the ultrasound. 

Other things I have to say: At my appointment on Wednesday the midwife said I was measuring smaller than I should be so she scheduled an ultrasound on Friday. (It's worth noting that this was the first appointment I was sure they'd comment on how I was getting bigger.) She called me when she saw the results and said I need to have a follow up ultrasound today. It appears my fluid levels are too low so she told me to drink 100+ oz of water each day over the weekend. You know what's hard to do when you're not thirsty? DRINK ALL THAT WATER. I feel like I'm drowning. 

We picked the baby's coming home outfit. I wanted them to be similar to clothes Christopher and I would wear and this is what we came up with. 

I made a headband to go with the dress because of course. 

I realized lately that for all my talk of not keeping the baby's name a secret I've never mentioned them here. Our boy's name is Carter Lee and the girl's is either Annabelle Lee or Katherine Lee. One of us is for Katherine and the other is for Annabelle. Feel free to share your opinion. Whichever first name we don't use this time we'll use for the next baby girl. If you pick my name I'll send you a Dunkin Donuts gift card. Carter was the last name of a friend who died of cancer a few years ago, Katherine would be after Katie and Annabelle is just a name we like. Lee is a family name of Christopher's. My dad's middle name is Grant so a little boy of ours down the road will have it for a middle name. We do what we can to keep the Civil War debate alive!

snow and ice and Sesame's shower

Sometimes it's feast or famine when it comes to blogging material. We've just been hit by a feast because all the sudden I have SO MANY THINGS to say. I'll do my best to keep things brief.

Our Olympic opening ceremony party was a success. I won't give my opinions on everything, but I think we can sum it up by saying the Russians very clearly skipped over any unsavory parts of their history and that Vlad was pretty unimpressed by the whole show.

Unless that is his impressed face?

Last week I went home for my baby shower. There was snow! And ice! And I loved it! I know. You're all sick and tired of snow but I hadn't seen any this year. 

Aaron had the distinct privilege of driving me and Sesame to the shower. Look how thrilled he was. Now that I think about it, he looks about this thrilled in every picture I've ever posted. He almost gives Vlad a run for his money.

We asked the guests to bring bath toys to donate to Operation Shower. I surrendered my camera over to others for the party so we don't have any pictures of what was brought. Which is just another way of saying I wasn't on the ball enough to ask someone to take a picture of the rubber whale. 

Thanks to my slightly unphotogenic self there aren't many pictures of me opening gifts where I don't look completely bored or like I'm glowering at Elizabeth. I was neither bored nor glowering, but the pictures tell a different story. This picture passed my over-critical inspection. Look how excited Hannah was about the blanket Marisa made me! 

I call this The Aftermath. I have no idea what the furry thing near the yellow ribbon on the floor is. I know for certain I wasn't given a rabbit.

I shipped all the gifts down so I plan on taking more pictures once they arrive . Nothing is more riveting than pictures of hangers or bottles.

Elizabeth objected to Mom touching my stomach in this picture. I don't understand why since it's not her stomach. As long as people abide by my rule of not touching too high or too low I really don't mind. 

On the way back to Tennessee I flew out of Boston and had a layover in Washington DC. When I finally got to my seat on the first plane (it takes a long time to get to row 33) I sat next to a young couple traveling home to California. They were unmarried and had been vacationing in a warmer climate and while they had a great time, they didn't like their hotel. They didn't tell me any of that information. I just so happened to overhear while "reading" my book. Anyway. The man leaned over and asked me if we were going to Washington state or "the other Washington". I will be the first to admit that I'm terrible with directions, but it seems slightly important to know where you're traveling to. I said we would be landing in the District of Columbia aka the other Washington. I almost asked where he was when all the announcements about THE NATION'S CAPITAL and RANDOM SECURITY CHECKS BEFORE ENTERING THE DISTRICT OF COLUMBIA were being made but I didn't. Instead I suggested they exit the aircraft using the designated doors immediately if they were on the wrong plane. But then we took off so who knows if they ever made it home.

All I know is now I'm back with my main squeeze and I have no plans of going anywhere for a long time. Rushing through an airport when I only have a 12 minutes layover AND I GO TO THE WRONG TERMINAL OMG is too much for me. I have decided to never fly with Sesame once he/she is evicted from Hotel Womb. Covered wagon all the way.

Future best friends. Or spouses. Or both.

The day I told Katie about Sesame was the day she told me about her baby. She didn't tell me so much as I figured it out when she started giggling uncontrollably and I knew EXACTLY what was up. When you know someone for 21 years you can tell these things.

We told each other about our babies the same day, our due dates are 3 days apart and today, by sheer coincidence, we're each having a baby shower on opposite sides of the country.

Sarah and Katie, best friends since 1993. 

Sesame and Coconut, best friends since 2014, aka their womb days.

If only I'd remembered to pack some tiny American flags

It's finally time for my biyearly Olympic opening ceremony party! 

A few thoughts:

I haven't decided what my Olympic ring snack will be but at least I don't have to worry about the shape or colors. 

The Russians chose "Hot. Cold. Yours." as the motto for the games. Could someone explain to me what this means? I appreciate that they're trying to include the common man with yours, but hot and cold? How many winter events are hot? I am so confused. 

I wonder how many times the announcers will say, "He's really going for the gold this year!" And the other athletes aren't? 

All they have to do is show a video of an athlete overcoming adversity with inspiring music playing in the background and I'm done. Sign me up as president of their fan club. Well done, NBC. 

And finally, the Norwegian curling team is dressed to impress.

More power to those who can rock the red, white and blue chevron. 

the deeper the snow the happier I am

Monday Elizabeth and I traveled back to the land of my birth. I usually fly alone and while I don't mind, having a travel companion is useful for the following reasons:
* someone to talk to and share snacks with (obviously)
* someone to leave your luggage with when you need the restroom. I hate trying to handle all my bags in those situations. (Quick restroom story. I saw a man, VERY CLEARLY A MAN, walk slowly into the ladies room in the Charlotte airport. I feel bad for all involved when he realized his mistake.)

The trip was uneventful in every way. I didn't want the plane to crash but I enjoy a little excitement. The man sitting next to us on the first flight slept almost the whole time. When the flight attendant asked if he wanted a drink there was an obvious language barrier between them. I almost offered my sign language skilz but I didn't think they'd be helpful in this situation. The woman next to us on the second flight started talking about how she doesn't want to do a toxin cleanse that involves tubes in her colon. Obviously that's a normal topic to discuss with strangers.

The rest of the country might be tired of snow, but I'm not. I've seen all of one inch this year. I can almost count the number of snowflakes in my backyard. It's pathetic, really. I was so excited to see snow when we landed and then watch it snow all day. The people of Tennessee would die a thousand deaths if they saw 12" of snow in their backyard but I think it was the greatest thing.

Guilty as charged.

Watch Sesame Grow: week 31

Edition: It's getting really awkward to pose by myself all the time

Size of baby: About 16 inches, 3 1/3 lbs. The baby's come a long way from it's kidney bean size days.
Fun fact: More of a want than a fact, but I hope Sesame Pie is plumping out in the cheeks department. 
Size of mother: Up about 1.7 lbs to a grand total of 140.7. I've come a long way from the 115 lbs days when I get married. 
Worst part of the week: I ran out of one of my medications on Friday. It took four days of phone calls to different doctors and I really thought the refill wasn't going to go through. DESPERATE TIMES, PEOPLE. God bless Ulla at the Walmart pharmacy for her efforts in getting it because I was desperate. If I didn't have strong dislike toward names starting with U, I'd consider naming the baby after her. 
Best part of the week: Besides the obvious joy of being reunited with my medicine, the best part of the week award goes to not getting sick even though I felt bad all week. 

Other things I have to say: 
1. Elizabeth and I painted the frames for the elephant pictures in the baby's room. They look so adorable and one of these months they might actually migrate from the sitting on the floor to hanging on the wall.
2. It's bedtime! My favorite time of the day!